Driving on the Highway

Since I drive down to Indianapolis several times a week this summer, I've spent quite a few hours driving on the highway, on I-69 to be precise. I've come to realize a couple things that I wish the other drivers around me knew. Since I can't actually speak to the drivers, I'll say it here. Maybe they'll find it someday.

To the car going under the speed limit and slowly passing cars while in the left lane...
Good job on almost going the speed limit. However, just because you're slowly passing cars doesn't mean you should stay in the passing lane for 20 miles at a time. Those cars behind you? Chances are, they aren't also going the speed limit because they want to, it's because they can't drive right through your car, and the cars in the right lane aren't spaced widely enough apart to pass you.

What's more, no one should need to go into the right lane to pass you. Yes, it's much more convenient to you to never need to change lanes. I promise you, though, if you move over between the two semis that have about three car-lengths between them, I'll accelerate up to the speed I want and pass you. It'll take like 5 seconds; less time than it'll take for you to cover the distance from one truck to the other. Net effect? You turned your wheel slightly right, then slightly left, and end up right where you were before. I'm no longer stuck behind you and can continue on my merry way.

The reason I'm not tailgating you to try to strongly signal that I want to pass you is because that's dangerous to do at high speed, it's kinda a jerk move to do, and it requires way more focus than hanging back. Please don't take the fact that I'm not riding your bumper to mean I'm fine hanging back there as we agonizingly inch past truck after truck. Please pull over into the right lane every now and then so people can pass you.

To the car which pulls out in front of me to pass a truck as I'm quickly about to overtake you both...
Seriously? You couldn't wait 10 more seconds to pull out to save me from having to break? What did you get out of doing this, exactly? You didn't even accelerate very much, if at all. I'm pretty sure I could've passed you before you hit the truck if you'd just kept going. Please just wait a bit longer next time, then pull out behind me.

To the car which brakes to about 50 mph as we pass an accident on the other side of a divided highway...
Stop doing that.You're satisfying some sick voyeuristic urge, and majorly inconveniencing everyone else in your lane, particularly me. You're not going to stop and give them help. You're not putting them in any additional danger by quickly passing - you're a hundred feet away across the meridian. No one's coming near you. No, you just want to see some destruction, some mayhem. Stop it. You'll probably just cause another accident somewhere with some other voyeur who doesn't notice how much you've braked as they're watching, rapt, through their window.

To the car which pull out in front of me as I'm coming up on you and a truck, and you accelerate to quickly pass them then quickly move back to the other lane before I reach your car...
Thank you. You did everything right. Keep on keeping on.

Keep these thoughts in mind as you're driving, and hopefully we'll all get where we're going faster and happier.